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They glance at you, maybe even smile for a second, then carry on with their conversation. You feel the room shrink, your heart rate quicken, your face go red: But then the sensible part of your brain tells you to forget it: At this point, Elizabeth Bruch , a professor of sociology at the University of Michigan, crashes in to your thought process and this news article. Yep, she says. Leagues do seem to exist. In fact, most online-dating users tend to message people exactly 25 percent more desirable than they are.

Bruch would know. Imagine for a second that you are one of the users Bruch and her colleagues studied—in fact, imagine that you are a very desirable user. Your specific desirability rank would have been generated by two figures: If you contacted a much less desirable person, their desirability score would rise; if they contacted you and you replied, then your score would fall.

The team had to analyze both first messages and first replies, because, well, men usually make the first move. But people do not seem universally locked into them—and they can occasionally find success escaping from theirs. Her advice: People should note those extremely low reply rates and send out more greetings. Michael Rosenfeld , a professor of sociology at Stanford University who was not connected to this study, agreed that persistence was a good strategy.

Of the study as a whole, he said: Across the four cities and the thousands of users, consistent patterns around age, race, and education level emerge. White men and Asian women are consistently more desired than other users, while black women rank anomalously lower. Bruch said that race and gender stereotypes often get mixed up, with a race acquiring gendered connotations.

If this was a site that was 20 percent white, we may see a totally different desirability hierarchy. And Bruch emphasized that the hierarchy did not just depend on race, age, and education level: Especially in New York. Across all four cities, men and women generally tended to send longer messages to people who were more desirable than them.

Women, especially, deployed this strategy. But the only place it paid off—and the only people for whom it worked with statistically significant success—were men in Seattle. A more educated man is almost always more desirable, on average: Across all four cities, men tended to use less positive language when messaging more desirable women. Most people seem to know their position on the hierarchy because they most contact people who rank the same.

We want to hear what you think about this article. Submit a letter to the editor or write to letters theatlantic. Robinson Meyer is a staff writer at The Atlantic , where he covers climate change and technology. Facebook Twitter Email.

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Whether you're straight, gay, bi, or otherwise, dating as a guy can be rough. Sometimes you want to make the first move, but you don't want to appear over eager. After all, if it's a lady you're pursuing, chances are she's received more than a few unsolicited messages already. But if you play it too cool, you risk getting beelined into the friend zone or getting ignored all together. The proposition can be frustrating and intimidating, especially if you don't know what's out there or where to start. How does anyone even meet new people nowadays? Best hookup apps and sites and how they can help you get it on.

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