Part of the Sequence: The Science of Winning at Life. Also see: I didn't like the jealous feelings that had arisen within me. I didn't like the desperate, codependent 'madness' that popular love songs celebrate.
What is Rational Love?
Here we have what I categorize as primarily a virtue signaling profile. The problem is that virtue signalling actually makes you less appealing, even subconsciously to people who would otherwise agree with you. Now, if we were talking about actual virtues honesty, integrity, rationality, etc. But with virtue signalers, it always seems to come down to two things — politics and feminism.
Guess how appealing those topics are to most people? The more you virtue signal, the less appealing you become. They often have no idea what actual virtue is, mistaking it for passionate cause-support which is common among young people, but not for good, rational reasons. So if you notice any of this grandstanding in your own profile, dial it back and remember the point of dating profiles — to attract good people. There are a few things at play here.
First, this person is automatically dealing with a strong self of entitlement perhaps even narcissism. Second, the point of online dating is to attract people with your profile. So this is her chance to make a good first impression, and this woman chooses to sneer at nearly everyone. I wish that this profile was an outlier and that this level of entitled hostility was rare. And then realize that finding good, authentic people to connect with is hard, and getting harder.
Most people blunder and fumble around emotionally, vaguely reminded that they are trying to attract a partner. But almost immediately, they lose sight of the goal and begin treating it like all kinds of other things — a place to vent their frustrations about past relationships, a place to virtue signal about their politics or social justice proclivities, or a place to aggressively berate the other people on the platform or the platform itself.
The above picture shows a woman who is quite pretty in the face which, no doubt, she is banking on to do most of the work for her , but bland to the point of nearly-invisible in the text. World traveler — This explains nothing. Where in the world? Why those places? What do you get out of traveling? Lover of life — Commendable but vague. Which aspects of life? Why is your life lovable?
Lover of wine — Loving a particular kind of alcohol is not a personality trait. Unless you own a brewery or vineyard, you can take it as a given that everyone enjoys drinking on occasion. And if you are extremely into wine, talk more about it. Yeah, we all love food. We also love oxygen. Lover of laughing — People laugh as a natural reflex from the moment they are born.
It releases endorphins that make us feel good. Still pretty vague, however. Do you own a dog? Are you hoping a guy comes along with his own dog? So while she may love working out, would she strongly desire a man to work out with her? Does she even care if the man is fit? We can assume probably, but we have no concrete way of knowing. Does she want to hook up? Does she want to drink a ton of wine?
Does she want to walk through a dog park? We have no way of knowing. They are useless to the point of annoyance. The aim of the Rational Dating Blog is to improve the chances that my readers find love — that is, long term romantic partnership. Lots of people. Another thing to consider is that I deal in generalities.
All the time. And we all do, even if some of us refuse to admit it. Most people follow most common patterns in their lives. Yes, there are some submissive polyamorous men out there and some dominatrix asexual women, but they are few and far between. And who are John and Jane? Well, John wants to find a kind, sweet, nurturing, reasonably attractive woman to be the eventual mother of his children and committed partner through thick and thin.
He wants someone he can count on to maintain a stable foundation from which to create a comforting home and loving family life. Jane, on the other hand, wants a rational, protective provider does not preclude her having her own career , who acts as a stabilizing force to any emotional turmoil. She wants to know that her man is almost always right in his decision making, and has the will and ambition to turn his desires into reality for the two of them, as well as their eventual children.
These are just the broad strokes and the blog will get into great detail about John and Jane over time. But establishing this baseline is important to understanding the motivation that underlies the Rational Dating Blog. You may have your profile set up to maximize the pursuit of as much casual sex as you can handle. I can definitely help you get what you want. I hope you laugh at, ponder, get defensive at, grapple with your defensiveness from, learn from, and ultimately enjoy your time reading this blog.
Book a Consultation. Virtue Signals. Pronouns — Already we can see where this profile is headed. No one you would ever want to date. Or it could just be a joke. Bad jokes in profiles are worse than no jokes at all. Transphobic — Again we have a total virtue signal. Chances are, her roommate is guilty of the sin of thinking that men are men and women are women.
Black hearts — And finally we come to the pure, distilled virtue signal. This is all about her and it has essentially nothing to do with dating or trying to find a suitable partner. Rational Dating. In fact, the apps are flooded with them. What is the goal? Intro to Rational Dating. July 19, Intro to Rational Dating July 15,
Rationality and decision theory work for relationships, too! For example, in heterosexual dating (in the USA) the man is expected to ask for. Rest In Peace, John Nash, hero of the movie ‘A Beautiful Mind’ and of many an economics student’s a-ha experiences, who died end of last month. Nash received the economics Nobel Prize in for his findings in game theory. Game theory, which studies interaction and.
People are random and unpredictable. We spend our lives trying to figure them out, to calculate their moves and guess their feelings. Yet, while there will always be a sense of mystery, there are consistencies in the randomness of human behavior. According to the Myers—Briggs Type Indicator MBTI , a questionnaire designed to indicate psychological preferences in how people perceive the world and make decisions, there are two rational approaches to how human beings make decisions: Some of us are all about objectivity, and some are all about subjectivity.
Discussion in ' Dating during a Reboot ' started by margun , Sep 6,
As a writer and podcast co-host, Michelle expresses her views on relationships, marriage, divorce, dating, parenting, and step-parenting. Well, like most people, they get lonely. They desperately want to be part of a couple.
Why Every Relationship Should Have One 'Thinker' And One 'Feeler'
These temperaments share the qualities of being abstract thinkers who approach situations in a theory-focused, pragmatic mode. Getting a Rational to open up and show their tender side can be as challenging as the toil of Sisyphus How do you connect with a partner who is known more for his brilliant mind than his brilliant romance? On paper at least, Rationals are the type least likely to want to put a ring on it. That's because they often don't appreciate, or choose not to follow, cultural norms that dictate when and how one should date, marry, have children and so on. While they may be interested in someday achieving these milestones, they're usually in no particular hurry for love.
4 Rational Reasons Why You Should Stop Dating Right Now
Here we have what I categorize as primarily a virtue signaling profile. The problem is that virtue signalling actually makes you less appealing, even subconsciously to people who would otherwise agree with you. Now, if we were talking about actual virtues honesty, integrity, rationality, etc. But with virtue signalers, it always seems to come down to two things — politics and feminism. Guess how appealing those topics are to most people? The more you virtue signal, the less appealing you become. They often have no idea what actual virtue is, mistaking it for passionate cause-support which is common among young people, but not for good, rational reasons. So if you notice any of this grandstanding in your own profile, dial it back and remember the point of dating profiles — to attract good people. There are a few things at play here. First, this person is automatically dealing with a strong self of entitlement perhaps even narcissism.
Most marital unions were either arranged or based on a logical, rational decision to blend lives because it made sense for economic or political reasons. Back then, romantic love lived in art, music, poetry and in the tortured hearts of men and women who were married to someone else.
Rest In Peace, John Nash, hero of the movie 'A Beautiful Mind' and of many an economics student's a-ha experiences, who died end of last month. Nash received the economics Nobel Prize in for his findings in game theory. Game theory, which studies interaction and negotiation, is one of the best fields within economics to consult for dating.
The rational male. Dating and dealing with women
I managed to get some time with Niko once again yesterday. However, way back in my early days at SoSuave I made the connection to the psychological principle and what PUAs of the time were advocating as a means to control in seduction. It certainly plays a part in the entirety of holding Frame, but the overall establishment of Frame with a woman, with other men, with your family or with your employer requires an art that extends past just how one thinks of himself. Frame is everything. Always control the Frame, but resist giving the impression that you are. In psych terms, frame is an often subconscious, mutually acknowledged personal narrative under which auspices people will be influenced. As most of my readers know, I try to avoid specific prescriptive advice. That said, in the coming months I will be offering some more generalized, prescriptive ideas or suggestions as to how I feel men might apply certain Red Pill principles in their lives. It runs about an hour and a half. Whether women are being encouraged to rid our homes of useless belongings, or urged to shop for new ones, the result is the same: Society continues to associate women with the home and the material, men with the outside and experiences. An orientation towards stuff over experiences, moreover, gets cast either as recklessly materialist or, as Tony perceives it, an impediment to enjoying life.
Love Advice From a Beautiful Mind -- 5 Rational Dating Strategies
Rationals are out to change the world. From a distance, it would seem kind of cool to date a world-changer. After all, they envision, strategize, create, and explore—coming up with visions, plans, inventions, and theories, which make a dent on the planet. Well, be forewarned; it will change your life. You date a world-changer, and your world will change too. Maybe for better, or maybe for worse.
.Richard Cooper on How to Manage Risk in Dating and Marriage