Why i keep dating losers
There are men, and women, out there whose sole purpose in life is to see how many people they can pick up — and subsequently dump. The users are what many call players and they are just in it for the sport of picking up women. Losers genuinely think they want a relationship but for one reason or another, are incapable of truly committing. A confident, happy man will seek out a happy, confident woman. An unhappy man with low self-esteem and low confidence will seek out a similar woman. A confident man will never purposefully seek out a woman with low self-esteem and confidence.
Dating Advice on Avoiding Losers and Attracting the One
I just don't get it. What a loser! We tend to act surprised when our latest love interest proves to disappoint us. As women we are nurturers by nature. We want to see the best in our potential partner however it's to their credit and our chagrin. If we would only pay attention to the early warning signs, we may have avoided heartbreak all together. For instance, your first date is an interview. During an interview, you never reveal your true self instead you show your best self.
Why would you want a perspective boyfriend to know about your ex or that fling you had over the summer? Well, the same can be said for him. He will only place his best foot forward. Therefore, you have to pay close attention to not only what he is saying but also how he handles himself. Remember, losers are not as easy to spot, as you would think. The word loser usually conjures the image of a man in his mid to late 30s jobless, living in his mom's basement playing video games.
If only it was that easy to define a loser. A loser can be charming, polite, cultured, and even successful. It is of extreme importance you see the signs that he could be a loser on the first date. The reason I stress the first date is simple. When you go shopping for a little black dress, you browse the department store. You go rack to rack until something appeals to you. Once you find a dress, you try it on to see if it fits; if it doesn't you leave it behind in the dressing room.
Now what happened if you just bought the dress without trying it on? Well, it would be a hassle to get in your car, go back to the store, and return it, not to mention time consuming. Our first option to try on the dress then buy makes the most sense. The same is said for dating. If you notice your date could be a loser, then stop dating him before you invest your energy and time in a second date.
It's Saturday night. He picks you up at your place. He's dressed impeccably and smells fantastic. He opens the car door; you smile impressed by the courteous gesture. On the drive to the restaurant, he tells you about his day. You wait for your moment to interject about your hectic day at work, your latest project, and how you adopted a puppy last week but hence you never get a word in. For the rest of evening, he pollutes your ears with his life, his job, his family, his goals, and his needs.
Miss, sorry to break the news but your first date is your last date. He is your Mr. Certain things in life should be hard like solving world hunger, finding the cure for cancer, or resolving the Middle East Conflict but dating is not one of them. Dating should be fun, enjoyable, and painless. If your date exhibits the following behaviors, he should not be awarded with your company again:.
The above signs are tell tale indicators your date is a loser. Maybe you're thinking it's unfair to judge someone so quickly, perhaps he was nervous or overcompensating, or intimidated or, or, or He is revealing his hand of cards to you. You're not misinterpreting him. Do not try to understand his motivations for acting like a jerk. Ladies, we have a tendency to empathize with others too much. We want to identify the reasons why he behaved poorly at dinner.
Yet, why do we spend so much time focusing on him? Think about all the time you spent understanding and unraveling the mysterious behaviors of your ex, you certainly could have gotten your master's degree in him. Bottom line, if he acts like a loser, sounds like a loser, drum roll please Do not make excuses for him in order to have company on a Saturday night. Real Life. Real News. Real Voices. Help us tell more of the stories that matter from voices that too often remain unheard.
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Also, he's always swearing that he's trying to do better and up his game. You date losers because you truly, honestly, don't believe that you can do better. Some women have terrible taste in men. It's not necessarily their fault -- there are subconscious forces at work in how we pick a partner.
What do you think we should do for ourselves to draw a healthy, stable, loving relationship into our life? In answer to this question, I first I want to ask: Because we want the perfect desert. They have low self-confidence and think they are lucky that someone actually likes them.
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Men are dogs. Which begs the question: Settling for a deadbeat loser is like settling for a job you hate.
How to Stop Attracting Losers into Your Life
Almost everyone in the dating world readily admits that they have a type. Men might admit to liking blondes or girls who are tomboys; women might admit to liking men who are built or unforgivingly ambitious. What this means is that men and women have a tendency to date the same type of person, even when it has led, over and over again, to an unhealthy relationship and ultimate heartbreak. Perhaps you've seen it in yourself or your friends — Sally always goes for guys who are emotionally unavailable and Jeff only goes for girls who are after his money. This tendency, as you might have guessed, is not a good thing—it leads to a pattern, a pattern of frustration, heartbreak, and, eventually, cynicism about love. When this pattern finally becomes too ridiculous, those following it go one of two ways:
Meeting Mr Wrong: Seven Losers To Look Out For
Dating Unplugged. So when that tall, dark, handsome guy catches your eye, how can you tell the difference between an overactive imagination and the red flag warning sign that this man is not the one for you? What constitutes paranoia in the early phase of relationships? Wasting time on someone who is not worthy of you is like engaging in the seven deadly sins and should be avoided. So here are the top seven loser dates to look out for and the red flags that give them away. At work he happily follows time schedules but believes there is no place for deadlines at home. He rarely returns your calls and it feels like you are always chasing him trying to pin him down. He complains that his past girlfriends were too uptight, too controlling or wanted too much from the relationship.
I just don't get it.
Some women have terrible taste in men. It's not necessarily their fault -- there are subconscious forces at work in how we pick a partner. A woman who consistently goes for drunks, lowlifes, abusers, or otherwise unworthy men is often caught in the grip of an unacknowledged struggle with herself. She's doing something called "repetition compulsion" wherein she tries to recreate the dynamics of her past in order to finally gain mastery over them.
Everyone has that friend, the one who dates guys that leave the rest of you scratching your heads. There are a million reasons why you and almost every other woman in the world sometimes fall for a loser. He may not have much going for him, but he sure is a good time. Well, obviously, because you are. Still, it feels good when a guy is constantly singing your praises. No girl hates receiving constant compliments. Of course he respects your ambition and applauds your success — he desperately needs a sugar mama! It makes you feel good about yourself. It constantly forces you to reexamine your choices and your place in life. Are you content and satisfied with everything, or do you need to push yourself to do better? You have low self-esteem.
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